"This weather is a bit ridiculous..." grumbled Hamish.

"What are you talking about?" exclaimed Kellen. "It’s August. This is summer. A few warm days is entirely appropriate for August."

"I was just making conversation..." shrugged Hamish. "Are you going to the ponds today?"

"I was thinking about, but I’m not sure I can be arsed..." replied Kellen. "It’s such a schlep to get to, and it’s going to be rammed today."

"How did your catch-up with Oliver go?" asked Hamish.

"Pretty good!" nodded Kellen. "He only borrowed £40 from me."

"That’s good?" clarified Hamish.

"Totally..." nodded Kellen. "I kind of went in expecting him to ask for more, so when he only asked for £40 I was so relieved - I didn’t hesitate, just transferred it to him straight away."

"Fair enough..." smiled Hamish. "So, he’s doing okay?"

"Yeah, he’s fine..." nodded Kellen. "Same as always. What are you up to tonight?"

"I’m going to Hard On..." replied Hamish.

"Really?" said Kellen. "Hard On? I didn’t think that was your kind of thing?"

"I’m not sure that it is, to be honest..." admitted Hamish. "I mean, I like the idea of a no-holds-barred crazy sex party, but then I just get so nervous and anxious about it all that it just gets a bit overwhelming."

"So, you’re forcing yourself to go?" asked Kellen.

"Pretty much..." nodded Hamish. "I’ve got my outfit picked out, I’ve shaved my balls, and I’ve dosed up on PrEP. To quote Tiffany Haddish, she’s ready!"

"What are you wearing?" asked Kellen.

"I’ve got a black jockstrap..." explained Hamish. "Plus I've got black shorts, long black socks, and a white tank."

"Are you wearing boots?" asked Kellen.

"I don’t have any..." replied Hamish. "I’m planning to go with some white trainers, pass it off as a bit of a sports fetish or something."

"That works, I guess..." nodded Kellen. "Who are you going with?"

"I’m just going by myself..." shrugged Hamish. "I just thought it would be less stressful if I just quietly went along, checked it out, got off, then came home. You don’t want to come, do you? It’s at XXL - I think it’s going to be fairly busy."

"I think I’ll pass, but it sounds fun..." grinned Kellen. "I’m sure you’ll have a good time. You shaved your balls?"

"Obviously I shaved my balls!" exclaimed Hamish. "No one wants hairy balls in their mouth. No one!"

mehdizadeh
Photo by Mubariz Mehdizadeh / Unsplash

Follow Gareth Johnson on Twitter


Get the t-shirt

Show your support for the Hoxton Street series by getting your hands on the official t-shirt.

Order your Hoxton Street t-shirt now